There is an eleven year old boy in my class and for a lack of a better term he is a cry baby. One time, one of his classmates took a sandwich out of his hands and callously threw it on the ground. My student began to cry & ran away as the other children stood there and laughed.
I have noticed that more or less, crying begins to drop off after 3rd grade, and by 6th grade boys don't cry at all. I am fascinated by the impact that the socialization process has on boys. Males, since the beginning of humanity, have been socialized to be men. Some people may think this is a hindering notion, but it does in fact serve an evolutionary purpose. Can you imagine if in a hunter & gatherer society, a man started crying? He would be eaten by a bear. Survival of the fittest is a legitimate phenomena. If a hunter is too busy crying, he becomes opportune prey for a hungry animal. Thousands of years later this trait has been passed down, but it is now irrelevant. What was once an evolutionary tactic for endurance, has now been replaced by Ego. Crying is not socially acceptable and carries the stigma of someone who is weak.
Well I am here to say that crying is not characteristic of weakness, but rather strength. Think about it. It takes strength to make yourself vulnerable in front of others. More importantly, there are health benefits to crying. Shedding tears is scientifically proven to release toxins from the body and reduce stress. So the next time you scold your son for showing emotions, let him know it's okay to genuinely feel. Survival in today's society is all about empathy. Let's be more compassionate.
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